In Between

I've been in an odd place since I lost my job. I guess this is not surprising. I'm in an in between place where I'm having trouble moving forward, even though I know it's REALLY important to get moving right now. I've looked into some options, and there are some interesting opportunities available to me.

Michigan Works will train me in a presumed growing field. I was happy being an engineer, but perhaps I do need a change.

In the meantime, my previous employer has paid for two months for me at a company called Right Management, which will help me write my resume, give me practice interviewing, and look at my different options if I want to switch careers.

Between the two, I'm seriously thinking of giving up this whole engineering thing. It's an odd thought. For almost 8.75 yrs of working, and 4.5 yrs of schooling, I defined myself by the title of engineer. It wasn't just what I did, it was who I was. Now that may not be the case anymore.

I know this may be silly to you. Why would someone define themselves so closely with what they do? I don't think it's unusual for engineers, though.

For now I'm an engineer. Tomorrow? Who knows.

Here's to the Fallen

I finished the last post, and realized that I overlooked one of the things I really wanted to do, and that is recognize those people who I knew who lost their jobs on Wed.

So, to Greg, Rayyan, Brian, Joel, Kendra, and especially David, those special few I knew out of the approximately 300 who, like me, lost their jobs, and to Will, Sara, Helene, and Jeremy, those smart few who took the damn buyout and walked away with more money, here's to you all. Good luck in all your endeavors.

Cheers.

And so falls the axe.

In my neck.

As I'm sure all of the zero people reading this blog were wondering, yes, last Wednesday the dreaded layoffs did occur, and so, as of about 1:30, Feb 18th, I am unemployed. Yup, my number came up.

The word that kept coming up in all of this was 'bloodbath'. Many fine people were let go.

I am dreadfully depressed by this. I keep trying to remind myself that it is not personal, and that my manager probably knew nothing about this. After all, on Tues, after attending a presentation to one of our customers that I had a large part in, he asked me how I would feel about going to Japan for training. Just 24 hrs later, the point is moot.

Now I have the eminent pleasure of trying to find an Engineering job in SE Michigan, when Ford, GM, and Chrysler are laying off Engineers in droves.

I have worked there just under 9 yrs. My resume had a layer of dust on it an inch thick, and I've completely forgotten how to write my objective.

All is not lost, of course. Friends and family have all reached out to make sure I knew that I wasn't alone in this. With my wife working, a meager severance, some unemployment from the state, and a bit of luck, we might make it through this, even keeping the house.

I must admit I'm a bit scared. Too much can go wrong, and this isn't the economy to be job searching in.

More as it develops.

Ready, Aim, Misfire?

Thursday was rumored to be the day the cuts were happening. This turned out not to be true. I am getting very sick of not knowing what's going on. The company has released no new memos, no communication, no nothing. We have no idea if there are even going to be more cuts, after they extended the voluntary buyout. Instead we have rumors and paranoia. The rumor now is that there will be pay cuts.

Today was the last day for another one of my friends at work. Another one bites the dust.

In the meantime, between waiting to loose my job and saying goodbye to friends, I'm working on a project that I don't understand. In October I was transferred to a new department, as I might have previously mentioned. I'm not really up to speed in my new position. No one around me has had any time to train me in what the new department does, and some of what I'm working on hasn't been done by my company in the US yet. So, now I have to present our 'design' (and I use the term loosely) to our customer when I don't even really understand how it works. My most recent task on this front has been to start pouring over customer specs trying to figure out what applies to this part, and how we have to test it.

I really feel out of my element on this project, and there's really no one to ask for help. My manager is in California at some seminar. Before he left, he told me to handle this. That was helpful, wasn't it? I really have to choice but to blindly stumble forward, though the current uncertainty really makes this difficult.

Perhaps the hammer will drop tomorrow. Perhaps not.

Obama; make up your darn mind!

I really don't understand Pres. Obama. On one hand, he's going to give money to help the big three survive. On the other hand, it looks like he's going to let California rape them on emission standards.

I understand wanting to help curb emissions and help the environment, but can't we wait till the economy and industry stabilize? You don't hook a patient suffering from blood loss to an IV, then ask them if they would like to donate plasma to the red cross. Bleed them when they're well! Sheesh.

Just look at the news:

GM cuts 10,000 white collar employees.
Nissan cuts 20,000 jobs, assumes loss.
Toyota sees worst loss since 1950.

Yeah, that definitely sounds like a healthy industry, doesn't it?

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

This has been a rough week for me. I've been sick with some sort of killer kold from outer space, and I've been to two different 'going away' gatherings for friends. I've just returned from one such gathering. One of my best work friends has taken the buy out, and we gathered at the bar to say goodbye. His last day is actually next week, but it was a joint party for someone else who's last day is tomorrow.

On the way home from the bar I heard "The Distance" by Cake. I haven't heard that song since college, which got me thinking about those friends I've lost touch with from "back in the day".

And now I'm depressed. Go figure.

In other gossipy news, there are some major organizational changes going on at work. Things are being shaken up pretty severely. I am fortunate that since my transfer I am out of some of the more startling changes. With the coming involuntary terminations, the company will have been reduced 50% from the last year or two. This is pretty frightening. In the meantime, I think it was GM which opened it's buyout to all hourly employees, and USgov still hasn't agreed on any sort of further aid.

And furthermore, the groundhog saw his shadow, which means six more weeks of winter.
I don't know about you, but I'm ready for spring.

Not so much like a falling axe, more like being nibbled to death by cats

The title is partly a reference to Babylon 5, where two of the characters make a half baked metaphor, and mix up ducks and cats.

Rumors abound at work, and I have been told that several people have already been walked out. In addition, several supervisors I know have be demoted to Sr. Engineers. Obviously, since I have not started with a despairing rant, I still am employed. This is not, however, the end of the cuts. It seems that the cuts may be happening over some time, unlike the last round in October, which happened all in one fateful day.

Today was the last day for one of my coworkers. He was not terminated, he took a voluntary buyout. This particular coworker started a few months after I did, and in the same group. Four years ago he was transferred to a different group. Last October, when the first round of cuts occurred, I was transferred to the same group as he. He was my lifeline while I was reeling from the changes. I still don't quite feel at ease in the new group, but now the one familiar face is gone. The corner desk, next to where I stood too look out the window, is empty. The company is just a bit colder.

Will, good luck wherever you go. I'll miss you.